Loss for words...

I don't know about you, but I rarely find myself at a loss for words. I ALWAYS have something to say.

I just got off the phone with a dear friend who is going thru a REALLY tough spot in life right now. We talked for a while and I let him vent. He is angry, confused, tired and scared for the future. The future of his ministry and the future of his family. I had so many thoughts going thru my head. I wanted to scream with him, cry with him, question with him, be bitter with him. I also wanted to point him to the Lord, to scripture, to prayer. But instead, I just cried a little with him and took it on my shoulders for a few minutes. I tried, anyway.

I can't take away his hurt, his pain. I can't answer his questions because I am asking most of the same ones myself. I wanted so badly to have "all the right answers", because I try so hard to always have the right answers. I don't like it when my friends hurt. And knowing that I can't really help is more than I can bare!

Dear friend,

Please know that my heart is broken for you. I feel helpless and incapable of taking any of this from you. It's almost more than I can bare, knowing that you are going thru this and I can't do anything about it. It feels so trite to say that I am praying for you, but I am. I have gone thru so many days in my lifetime where God seemed far away and circumstances of life seemed so big they could eat you up. And I know how truly difficult those days are. First hand, I know.
But I want you to know that even though it seems trite and cliche, I am praying for you. I'm praying for clarity and singleness of mind as you struggle through this. I'm praying that God will remind you of all the things that I didn't say on the phone. That He loves you and has a plan for you. That he knew you were going to struggle through this and He let it happen anyway. That our stupid choices in this life are not stronger than what He has purposed for us. We have to believe that, otherwise there isn't any real point to this life here on earth. Bad things happen and other people make decisions and choices that affect us, but God is so much bigger than all of those details. Lean into him because He is in control. He is in control. He is in control.

I love you so much, my dear friend!!

Rachel